DO RIGHT

i used to use alcohol
to stick me to the page
like a stamp
there was something i wanted to avoid
they dragged me
screaming and kicking and mumbling
into the examination room
parallel lines feeling

my only answer was
no, not so
i concealed the above
with a meek demeanour
with drugs and dreaming
now the fog is clearing
i do right with me

that it be known

let it be known that
should i die tonight
(heart attack or stroke)
it often hangs on a thread

the sway of your breasts keeps me alive
my daughter´s vivacity
my sons tenacity
keeps me alive

but me
like some billion others
it just hangs on a thread
and there´s scorpions in my head
horny sadists of the inquisition
getting their kicks off of torture
and the faceless ones with their imperatives
so i am screaming silently
a day late, as always
rushing ´cause i´m far behind
so many miles
away
way back then
in tepid bath water with my yellow plastic ducks

STATEMENT OF FACT

a cyclist swerves
pig´s head balanced between the handle bars
in my ear music compositions
that i cannot hear
my bits do not fit together
it was between night and the morning
in the grey hours
colour seeping in ever so slowly
i repeat
my bits do not fit together
there is a waterwheel in cordoba
squeaking and sloshing
my various IDs
floating like embryos pickled in formaldehyde
there are expanses of wheat
screams, lists, currencies
but please don´t listen
nor worry your sweet head
concerning the tentative articulations of a small boy
shouts, brine, juxtaposition
failed states, laughter, drambuie
a day late
a dollar short
my bits don´t fit together

a word in your ear

organise your desk
correct positioning of keyboard, mouse, paper
saves time and nerves
a chair with wheels
and everything in its place

set up the naming conventions, 
organise the folder structure, the back-ups,
check disc status regularly

and the heart ?
your heart of different ages
the heart you have from your mother
open your heart !

Q & A

what is the texture of your life right now ?

lonesome piano and chocolate

what are you hiding ?

my sexuality rumbling, my tears welling,  despair
the realisation
bearing down on me like a tanker
of my flaws and failures
hate and self-hate scratching on the door

i see the fissure in your face
it´s time to explode !

WHEN

when you are ninety-one
events, memories, images floating through your consciousness
and i am worm food
you will remember my embrace
and probably think
stupid man
silly boy
but the kisses were sweet

One God

truck driver
in the cab
rainy night
swish
so many miles
so many miles
turns off the music player
there is but one god
and that is yourself
to save you
or damn you